Everybody hates you: A brief guide to the Patriots’ many rivals

It’s hard to have a rivalry when you’re a dynasty, but over the years, the Patriots and a few teams have developed some bad blood.

Bernd Buchmasser is the managing editor of Pats Pulpit, SB Nation’s home for all things Patriots.

When you’re at the top of the game, it is inevitable that you make some enemies. Ali had Frazier. Edison had Tesla. Britney had Christina. The NFL is no different, rivalries can be found in every division whether they’re based on geography or simply because one of the teams wins so consistently that everybody else just naturally hates it.

Enter the New England Patriots.

Winners of five Super Bowls this century and breakers of countless hearts, the Patriots are not exactly well-liked outside of New England. However, not all of that animosity falls in the rivalry category. Patriots vs Panthers? Not exactly a rivalry, even though they met in the Super Bowl once. Patriots vs Raiders? Bad blood, sure, but two games does not make a rivalry. Patriots vs Cardinals? Wait, what?

The point is this: just because you and your fellow fans don’t like the Patriots does not make the team you support one of New England’s rivals. That said, some franchises actually can claim that they have a rivalry with the Patriots — for one reason or another. Let’s take a look at them.

Historic rivalries

Patriots vs. Jets

It’s not exactly Red Sox vs Yankees, but the rivalry between the Patriots and Jets has a long history — one that started appropriately.

When they were still known as the Boston Patriots and the New York Titans, their first ever meeting was decided by a controversial last-second fumble recovery for a game-winning Patriots touchdown. The organizations met 117 more times since then, including such contests as the Butt Fumble game or the Jets’ “can’t wait!” playoff upset. That doesn’t even cover all the off-field intrigue like Bill Parcells leaving New England, Belichicks’s“I have decided to resign as HC of the NYJ” press conference, Spygate, and Rex Ryan. It’s a long, proud, hate-filled history the two clubs share.

Patriots vs. Bills

While Patriots vs. Bills lacks the controversy of their history with the Jets, these two AFC East franchises still have a storied rivalry. Overall, they played 117 games against each other and produced some memorable meetings — the AFL’s first ever divisional playoff game in 1963, O.J. Simpson setting the single-game rushing record against New England in 1973, the “Lawyer Milloy Revenge Game” in 2003, and the 2009 opening day thriller.

More recently, the rivalry has been pretty lopsided. Led by Tom Brady, New England has dominated the series, winning 31 of 35 meetings since 2001.

Patriots vs. Dolphins

Only one team in the AFC East still has a winning record against the Patriots: the Dolphins. Miami holds a 54-52 edge over New England.

Early on, the rivalry was a one-sided affair in favor of Miami’s powerful teams of the 1960s and 70s, before the Patriots’ upset in the 1985 AFC title game turned the tide a bit. The 90s saw some high-quality quarterback battles between Dan Marino and Drew Bledsoe— arguably none better than the 1994 opening day meeting that saw the two pass for 874 yards. New England took control of the series in the 21st century. It’s still produced noteworthy moments, though. Just think of 2008’s Wildcat game (or don’t, if you’re a Patriots fan).

Short-lived rivalries

Patriots vs. Ravens

The rivalry with the Ravens can be traced back to December 3, 2007 when the unbeaten Patriots narrowly escaped Baltimore with a last-second win on Monday Night Football. The emotional contest laid the foundation for some heated playoff contests down the road.

The Ravens bested New England in 2009 and 2012, while the Patriots won in 2011 and 2014 — the latter being one of the most thrilling playoff games in recent memory (Edelman-to-Amendola, anyone?). But 2014’s meeting is the last one worth writing about, and with John Harbaugh on the hot seat in Baltimore this season, the short-lived rivalry between the two clubs could be a thing of the past.

The Super Bowl rivalry

Patriots vs. Giants

Make no mistake about it, Bill Belichick loves the Giants. This is also the reason why the two teams have played each other every single year in the preseason for 14 straight years.

The two teams’ rivalry goes beyond exhibition thrillers, though. You probably remember that the Giants spoiled the Patriots’ perfect season in Super Bowl 42. They also beat them in the title game four years later. It will probably be a while before the two teams meet again on football’s biggest stage, but the fact that a New York team beat a New England team in two Super Bowls is enough to create a rivalry-like flair. That, and those preseason meetings, of course.

Is it really a rivalry? Yes.

Patriots vs. Colts

In the early 2000s, nothing came close to the Tom Brady-Peyton Manning rivalry. Two future Hall of Fame quarterbacks (and Hall of Fame head coaches) at the height of their powers going against each other with playoff seeding and Super Bowl berths on the line. It was must-see entertainment every year, from Willie McGinest’s goal-line stop in 2003 to fourth-and-2 in 2009.

However, when Manning left so did the mystique of Patriots-Colts, to a degree. The on-field product has simply not been competitive since, and if not for some off-field drama — Deflategate, Josh McDaniels, Chris Ballard saying that “the rivalry is back on” — all that would remain are the memories of its glory days. But even that’s not enough to convince Patriots fans that a rivalry still exists between the two clubs.

Patriots vs. Steelers

The Patriots’ rivalry with the Steelers is similar to the one with the Colts. One fanbase is more intent on upholding it than the other. Despite that, the two teams have still had some big meetings over the years — starting in 1976, when New England upset the 17-point favorites in Pittsburgh. In the late 90s, the rivalry was renewed when the clubs met four times in the playoffs over a nine-year span. Since then, they have consistently been among the AFC’s top teams in terms of success. When going head-to-head, however, the success has mostly belonged to a Patriots squad that has won 11 of 14 contests this century.

The next rivalry?

Patriots vs. Chiefs

While the Patriots and Chiefs go all the way back to the old AFL, they have never really been rivals. They play in different divisions and met only once in the playoffs (in 2016, although an argument can be made that Bernard Pollard knocked them out of the postseason on opening day 2008).

Recently, things have started to change. The two teams have made for some entertaining football over the last couple of years and the union of quarterback Patrick Mahomes and head coach Andy Reid might – might– make them a serious threat to New England’s AFC dominance in the not too distant future.

So, there you have it, the complete list of the Patriots’ rivalries, past and present. However, things can change quickly in the NFL. Maybe, for some reason, the aforementioned Patriots-Cardinals rivalry will become a thing in the future. But I wouldn’t bet on it.